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It's been so long since I posted anything of substance.

I'm not sure the following could be considered "substance" or not, however.

Friday 7/9, Kevin, with his Special Olympics swim team, were honored at the Bowie Baysox game. They got a pre-game introduction, two guys got to throw out the first pitches, and many team members got to run out to the bases with the team. Kevin got to run out to second base. He stood there during the National Anthem, then sauntered back while the rest of the kids ran. That's my boy.




All the fertile office co-worker's wives have given birth and I'm still working on the last baby quilt. I have 10% of the blocks done (of 20) so I have a long way to go.

I'm trying to stay on top of the laundry instead of leaving something in the washer for a couple days or having two or three baskets of things that never got folded while warm and now need to be re-fluffed.

The kids have been back from camp for over a week now and I'm almost done with their laundry. The Boy brought back some clothes with someone else's name written inside. I still need to put them in the post.

I've been listening to BBC/Radio 1 a lot via the Internet and satellite radio in the new car. The Internet plays in real time, but Sirius time-delay's the show by five hours. Kinda messes with the mind a bit.

Wednesday 7/7 was our twentieth anniversary. Dan and I took the day off from work and played golf, then had dinner at Cityzen downtown at the Mandarin Hotel. Yum.

I took a golf lesson Saturday morning from Troy Beck. I'd totally lost the ability to hit fairway woods from the fairway and wasn't getting any real distance from my longer irons. She said I was standing up too soon because I was off balance, and that I was crowding my hands/arms. She had me stand farther back from the ball and gave me drills to practice keeping balanced. By the end of the lesson I was getting 125 yards out of my 7 wood!

It rained 1.38" on Saturday.

Back in June I went to Columbus/OSU for a Perl conference. Perl is a programming language, not a misspelled adornment. I was born and went to college not an hour away from Columbus in Urbana. Some of my college friends were still in the area so I had an opportunity to catch up with some of them. I had lunch with Piper who had lived in the dorm room across the hall from me and is now working in Columbus.

One night I drove out to Urbana and met up with Martha and David at the college. It's really a university now, but I'm having a hard time changing the name in my mind. We walked around campus remarking on all the changes made in the last thirty years and reminiscing about fellow students. My grandmother taught biology and botany there and had her lab/classroom and office in a lovely old building, Barkley-Baily Hall, which since has been turned in to plain classrooms, probably in the English department. The college built a new science/math building in which my grandmother is supposed to have a memorial classroom, but Martha hadn't seen it on a previous visit and I didn't look for it myself. While I was in town, I also drove past my grandparents old house and visited them at the cemetery.

I was supposed to meet up with another friend, but she didn't make it back into town in time. I was bummed. I hadn't seen her in years.

Fern went to ice skating camp for a week and came back pretty jazzed to skate at Worlds in Boston at the end of the month. Now she has a week to cram in all the lessons she can before she competes. Most of her events have seven girls in them. I sure hope she does better than last, I don't want her to be devastated and quit skating. She's so beautiful when she skates and I'm thrilled she has an activity she enjoys. She's been working at the snack bar at the pool and loves having a paycheck. She hates her bank because they are never open when I can get her there to cash the check. Should I let her get an ATM card?

I tried three times to get the new iPhone software to download before it was successful. The download took over 75 minutes each time and process would die with 5 minutes to go. I don't have the new iPhone 4 but I got many of the new features on my 3Gs with this download. Some of the new features are quirky and I'm still trying to figure them out. Oh well. I'd love to be a product test for Apple.

My brother and Roseanne finally opened their yarn shop in Culpeper, VA. I guess I need to visit sometime, huh?


Oh, that's enough rambling for now.

I Want to Write a Book

Most of the time Kevin's autism doesn't get in the way of life. That's just the way life is. On the other hand, if he were "normal," he'd be a loud teenage boy, driving, with a girlfriend and I don't know how I'd cope. You moms with teenage boys do great with your kids, and I'm sure if I had that kid all along, I'd be right there with you. But, I have this life with this Kevin, and it's just different. I'm doing a terrible job in explaining what I mean. It's kinda like two families living in identical houses, but one has the mirror-image floor plan. You adapt to your floor plan, and are thrown for a loop when you suddenly have to navigate the other house with your eyes closed.

Anyway, Kevin's been doing great lately. His spontaneous speech is fuller with more descriptions. He's even starting to get the idea of "why & because." The area of speech he still has trouble with is personal and possessive pronouns.

Kevin has problems with the concepts of me, my, mine, I, you, your, and yours. He understands these as concrete adjectives, just like "blue car" means the car is always blue. He doesn't get they change meaning based on who is speaking so "my room" means the master bedroom is mine when I'm speaking and his room is "my room" when he is speaking. In his mind, "my room" is always the master bedroom.

I end up talking in third person a lot: "This is Mommy's, that is Kevin's." It gets the point across, sometimes, but it's still frustrating, because once something has been dubbed with the "my" or "your" adjective, that's the way it will always be.

So, I have this idea for a picture book that would help autistics with these concepts. It'll have lots of pictures of people with thought bubbles identifying things. For example, a kid would be holding a toy and the bubble will have "This is my toy." The next picture would have the same kid with the same toy and another kid would have a bubble that said, "That is your toy." And so forth and so on, very repetitive, me, my, you, your, our, their, etc.

It might be too late to change his understanding of possession, it might already be ingrained, but I still think a picture book might help.


 

Spring Break

Ten-Day cruise aboard the Celebrity Millenium

The day before: applied for and obtained passports for the kids. Whew. That was close.

Departure from Bowie: four adult-sized people, four large suitcases holding clothes for at least 12 days, and four carry-ons in a Honda Fit. Should have taken a picture so we knew how everything would fit for the return.

Checked into the Best Western-Newark Airport at 10:30 with a 04:00 wake-up call for a 06:00 flight to Atlanta, connecting on to San Juan.

Check-in at the cruise terminal went fairly smoothly, had to fill out a health questionnaire: have we been sick? No, except for the major allergy attack that came on the day before, I was sneezing and had a runny nose like there's no tomorrow. Sheesh.

The ship is nice, quiet. Not in-your-face like Carnival tends to be. The general layout is very similar between the two, however. The typical demographic of Celebrity passengers is 55-75. This sailing skewed a lot younger because of spring break.

Luggage: finally delivered to our staterooms right before dinner, about five hours after boarding. What took so long? I start to worry it is still sitting on the dock somewhere.

Dinner: late seating, I asked for a table for four when we booked, they put us at a table for ten. Except there were only three seats left. Goldilocks was already at our table. sheesh. A table for ten, really? I really don't like to make other people endure Kevin's quirkiness, we like to eat alone. They are very apologetic and seat us upstairs for the night.

Tortola: not the island filled with pirates one might expect, especially those who are Johnny Depp fans. A smidge of sunburn where I missed with the sunscreen. Decent beach.

Sint Maarten: Narrow beach, more sunscreen. Didn't go to the French sided. Fern and I collect our free charms in all the ports as we did on the cruise a year ago Christmas. I've amassed quite a collection now.

St. Lucia: shore excursion to the Piton Falls. Who would have thought the roads were that tight, windy, and steep? Dramamine, please. We finally get a permanent dinner table assignment. We had open seating the first three nights because of the initial mix-up. Open seating is a disaster. Service is much better in the regular dining room. Much. They don't forget the silverware there.

Do you wave at strangers? Do you wave at the passengers on the other ships in the harbor when one ship is departing? Do you wave until they wave back which only encourages more of your fellow passengers to wave at them which encourages more of their fellow passengers to wave back at us?

Barbados: Dan and Fern take a zipline excursion while Kevin and I go to a beach. Met a lovely couple from the ship and asked the wife help me with the lotion on my back since Dan wasn't around. They both golf.

It's about 160 steps from Deck 2 where our staterooms are to Deck 10 where the breakfast and lunch buffets are. Kevin takes them up. I take them down. I can make it up to Deck 7 before getting on the elevator. Whew.

Grenada, the Spice Island: Catamaran snorkel/beach excursion and a sunburned back today. The spices are better in Guadalupe, by the way, but that was 15 years ago.

Day at sea: reading and sunning.

Curaçao: We rent a car. I drop Dan and the husband from the couple I met in Barbados off at the golf course and I take the wife and the kids to find a beach and to Jaanchie's restaurant for lunch. That's the place Dan and I went to for dinner a couple of times when we visited Curaçao three years before. Lunch is good but the service is way slow and we are late getting back to pick up the boys at the golf course. They seemed to have fun.

Aruba: We taxi to Eagle beach. Best beach by far, very wide with smooth, soft sand.

Down-face dog on the beach is relaxing, a nice stretch, until my foundation is washed away.

After the beach, I do some personal shopping and also collect our charms.

The new one is a bit bigger than the old one. When it's not sticking to my skin because of humidity or sweat, it hangs down loose on my metacarpal joint. Do I take another link out?

Another day at sea, more reading and sunning.

Back in San Juan: we take the El Yunqué rainforest tour, only because we have all day to kill, our flight home doesn't leave until 5:00.

Our flight to Miami is oversold. A flight to Baltimore is at the next gate. I offer three of our seats on our flight for seats on the BWI flight. (Our connection doesn't get in to Newark until 00:20, then there's the drive home and school the next day. This is the part of the vacation I wasn't looking forward to.) There are only two seats available on the BWI flight so I send Dan and Fern that way, Kevin and I continue on as originally planned. He's a little distraught about not having Daddy with him, but he settles down soon enough.

We depart San Juan for Miami over an hour late and just make it on to our next flight. (Dan and Fern arrive in Baltimore at the same time Kevin and I land in Miami. They get home and sleep in their own beds.) We make it to Newark, but our checked luggage doesn't. There are four groups of folks in the same boat, from the same boat, with no luggage. I file the missing bags report. Guess I didn't need that map to reload the suitcases in the car after all.

Kevin and I with our carry-ons get the car out of hock at SkyPark. $180 to park, free with the Best Western stay and fly deal. I hit the road, south on the turnpike to Exit 7, and spend what's left of the night at the Hampton. They gave me toothbrushes and toothpaste for me and the boy and deodorant for myself. I like Hampton Inn.

Home: at about 11:30, Kevin off to school. I try to drop him off directly but he won't go, he has to have his backpack.

The automated baggage system has no information about my suitcases. Then late in the afternoon, one bag has been found. I wonder if it's the one filled with dirty clothes?

Kevin's body clock is messed up. He heads to bed at 03:30 but is very distraught about not having his own toothbrush or flosser. It takes a while to calm him down.

O'dark:15 this morning my cell rings: "I have your suitcases, I'm in front of your house, sorry I'm late."

Sheesh.

Lesson learned: If airfare out of Newark is included in your cruise ticket and DC is $400 extra, go with DC.

Ceramics Mob

Saturday Kevin and I went to the ceramics studio for firing day, the day when the high-fire and raku kilns get fired. Kevin and I did a couple raku pieces (pictures later) and they turned out great.

Remember back in June when I posted about my car's twin parked at the art center?

Turns out, the car belongs to Eunice, a delightful woman who also takes ceramics classes. I think she likes it as much as I do that our cars have a twin, and we joke about driving the right car home.

On firing days we park behind the studio near the kiln instead of the front public lot. At the end of the day, it's easier to load your car that way. She opened the back of her car to load her supplies and I hollered over jokingly, "Get out of my car, Eunice!" She just turned around and grinned.

I need to pause her and explain about echolalia if you don't know already. Many people with autism will echo what they hear without the same inflection the original speaker used. If I ask Kevin, "How was your day, Kevin?" he'll reply "How was your day, Kevin." with a very flat voice. I'll have to repeat the question before he realizes it was a question for him to answer and not just blindly echo back. He is a full-fledged teenager now and his voice is so low, his echos come out quiet and almost gravely.

So, on Saturday when he hears me holler to Eunice, he repeats it a moment later in a voice that's so quiet, low and flat, it sounded like a mob threat: "Get out of my car, Eunice."


 

A Screw Loose

A week ago Thursday was my last ceramics class of the summer. I really love doing ceramics even though I'm not that good at it yet. There's just something about playing in clay that is satisfying on a visceral level. I want to take another class but I need to study the family schedule first to see if it'll fit in. I have a lot of unfinished pieces from the summer class I want to get done before I call it quits and move on to another hobby/activity.

So, last week at 10:00 pm my cell phone rings, my hands are dirty because I'm trying to finish cleaning up after myself in the studio. Fern is on the other end of the line, very distressed. Very. I'm trying to clean up, I'm trying to calm her down, I'm trying to hold the phone without rendering it unusable from the clay on my fingers. "Something bad has happened."

She is so distraught on the phone, wild thoughts are swirling and I can't help but think the worst: someone is dead, but because she's so distraught, it takes her, what seems like forever, to get the story out. No one is dead. No one is hurt. The computer is broken, she and Kevin were fighting over it.

Evidently, she moved the laptop to the other room so she could hook it up to the printer, but Kevin didn't think it belonged in the other room. He's very OCD like that. He'll get very upset when things are moved to places they don't belong, sometimes he'll be upset enough to become really agitated.

I've learned to bargain with Kevin, I'll explain thing needs to get moved here because reason and he can help me put it back when I'm done. That usually works, he sees an end to the discomfort of change and I've engaged him to help and staved off any aggression. Fern hasn't learned these tricks yet. Maybe this incident will help keep this trick in mind should she need it again.

So now we have a broken laptop. It turns out it's just a broken screen. Dan found a company that sells replacement screens and will even install it for you for $50. When we got our first Mac iBook, the memory upgrade was shipped separately and came with instructions for installation. I've seen the inside of laptops before, I was not afraid.

I took apart the laptop to get to the part number on the back of the broken screen, (I took out 12 minuscule screws to get there!) and ordered a replacement for $109 + shipping. It arrived yesterday and it didn't take me long to get the new one installed. It was quite easy and everything went back together nicely. Except, I had two screws left over. The laptop booted up so I'm not going to worry about it.





PS, I took pictures of the fix, but the camera battery died so you'll get them later.

Weekend

My weekend went great until I stopped doing things on my to-do list.

Saturday I bought and installed blinds in my daughter's room. She has curtains in there already, but needed the blinds, too. I got 2" blinds in a coffee color; they look like elegant wood.

I bought new blinds for the hall bathroom, but didn't get them installed.

I wanted to get a timer for Kevin's room but couldn't find an adequate one at Target, either it was too fancy or took up too much space on the socket and you couldn't plug in anything else. Kevin will sometimes fall asleep with the light on, wake up later, and be up for hours. He doesn't know he's supposed to turn off the light and go back to sleep and not to wake up anyone else. I want a timer to turn off his light for him to try to curb this.

I wanted to get the patches sewn on the next Girl Scout vest I need to work on. It's a catch-up vest where the mom brought me two years worth of stuff to sew on and it won't fit. She bought a sash to sew around the bottom to add more space, but I can't get motivated to get it done.

I've started keeping a ledger of the vests I have to work on, when they arrive and when I'm done with them. I got a bunch, 10 or 12, to work on this summer and I would often forget which I've had the longest and which I should wait to do. The ledger is helping with that, but I still have a backlog of about five to get done. The nice thing is it's time for these moms to start renewing their plan so I've got a little bit of cash in my pocket.

I did get to play golf with Dan twice over the weekend, once Saturday evening and once Sunday morning also with Mark and CG. I didn't do too badly, my short game is getting better, but I still need to get some distance on my fairway shots.

Surfing

Have you ever been channel surfing and it always seems like the same thing is always on the same channel? Like TNT is really the "Law and Order" channel and BBCAmerica is really the "Gordon Ramsay" channel. What else? How would you rename the channels? Yeah, OK, there's always news on CNN, but that doesn't count.

Waiting Room

I'm sitting in the waiting room at my son's pediatric dentist's office. He's getting his newly erupted molars filled and sealed. Last time we had this done, it was done as an out-patient at the hospital because he had to be sedated. This time it's just a mild sedative and nitrous oxide.

The dentist's office is next door to a Nite-time pediatrics office with free Wi-Fi so I'm able to get some work done while I wait. I've been here since 10:00 am, it's 12:40 now. Except for the fact the free WiFi blocks some web sites with certain web content. Not unusual, but number one being government sites. Can you believe it? I can't log in to the work web sites. Really? Governments sites blocked! So I'm on telework status but can't check my email. Sheesh.

Then I take a break to blog. Except Blogger is blocked. I can get to my specific blog, just can't get to the write a new post. Really? I wonder if porn sites are accessible? Then I remember I can email a post to blogger, problem solved.

They gave him his sedative earlier and Kevin now is back in the treatment room with under the influence of N₂O₂ and doing fine. So fine, in fact, he doesn't want me back there. I sneak peeks to check on him every couple minutes. After a check a while ago I realized I was hungry. Oh, for some candy or gum. Oh, yeah, this is a dentist's office.

There is a McD's next door. I check on Kevin again and let the staff know where I'm going.

The customers were lined up only one-deep at the counter, even though the drive through line is very long. "Can I help the next customer?" barked a gravelly older woman at the end of the counter, who clearly did not want to be there today. In my bubbliest voice I said, "Hi, how are you today? Can I have a number one, please." Medium or large? "Medium." Here or to go? "To go, please." She had started smiling a bit then, then became crestfallen. Oh. The nice ones always have it to go. I'm glad I could make her day a little better.

Now I'm back in the waiting room, Kevin is still doing well. It looks like they've finished drilling and are putting the sealant on the teeth.

They are done, and I just got the post-op information form. Kevin is eating the rest of my fries and slurping down my coke. Sheesh.

The boy is unphased, and I will recover, too, I'm sure.

Buying In

It took me a long time to learn this, and I'm almost embarrassed to admit it took even longer to put it into practice.

When Kevin runs out of deodorant he'll use what ever he finds in the bathroom (mine). He'll latch on to it so it becomes his and it doesn't matter where I hide it, he'll find it. It didn't matter if I got him a new stick, mine was his. Then I got the bright idea to have him with me when I bought him more. And it worked. He helped me pick out a 4-pack at the warehouse store and my deodorant is now cootie free.

It's so much easier for me to shop without him, he tends to have his own agenda in stores, but it's so much easier to get him to buy-in to a purchase when he's there. A while back he took my phone and took 60 pictures with it. I decided he needed his own camera. I took him to Walmart to pick one out, but he wondered off to toys to browse. I got a low-end Kodak camera without his approval and he won't use it.

So now, I'm learning. Or remembering, as the case may be.

I took the kids out Friday with stops at Old Navy and to get new shoes for Fern. Kevin lounged on the hassocks while she shopped for shoes. I saw a pair of brown Chucks in his size on the sale rack and remembered to get him involved in the purchase so he'd take ownership of the new shoes. Which he did. He picked out some shirts at ON too and was wearing one before the night was through.

He likes crew-height socks, which, in my opinion are not quite as fashion-forward as anklets when worn with shorts. I've tried to get him to wear some of his dad's with no success. So yesterday I had him help me pick out some new low-cut socks. He completely accepted them.

Kevin went off to the first day of school today wearing his new shoes, by choice, and I have high hopes for the socks next time he's in short pants.



 

I think he needs his own camera!

 

Going for Gold

It seems they, the big bad big brother "they," boogered up our computers so we can't upload images from cameras any more.

I can't post pictures from the Maryland State Special Olympic Games while here at work. You'll just have to close your eyes and imagine it. Hey!! [tap-tap-tap] not now! open your eyes, finish reading first. sheesh. I'll try to publish photos between kid events later.

Friday

Friday after school Kevin and I went up to Towson for the Games. Somebody at school put him on the bus when they weren't supposed to, so I had to meet the bus at the community center and ultimately, we were 45 minutes late. [image of angry mom, arms crossed, tapping foot]

We moved into our dorm room and joined the team for dinner. It was raining so the opening ceremonies were held inside. They didn't do the parade of nations counties so no hankies were needed. All the contingents were seated in large sections of the floor and spectators were in the stands. Since I had a chaperon credential I stayed with Kevin and the team the whole time. [panorama image of the Towson Center from the floor, people, athletes, coaches, police officers everywhere with Kimmy Misner and Joe Flacco on the dias]

The program lasted over two hours. I wanted to go to bed. There were hundreds and hundreds of athletes and coaches trying to get back to the dorms on the buses so Kevin and I walked. I told our coaches my plans. One was worried, it's night, it's far, do you know the way... I said, I have a map and a degree in geography, I'll be fine. The other coach laughed. Kevin and I made it back probably a full 10 minutes before the others and that's only because Kevin walks slower than I do.

Saturday

I didn't sleep well, too cold. I don't mind a cool room, but I counter that with a heavy blanket, except I didn't have a heavy blanket.

Kevin and I got up to join the team for breakfast. After breakfast it was on to the pool. There is a lot of hurry-up-and-wait time with this sort of event. The swimmers generally just stay in the team circle until it's time to be staged. This was our first time at States so I had to learn the routines and keep track of The Boy. He was swimming in event #62 25M Free. Although the listings all said 25M Free, I think the pool was only 25 yards long. Oh well. Anyway, right before he was to be staged, Kevin decided to explore. He wanted to watch the races. We finally found him.

I was impressed with the way the events were run. The small qualifier meets we'd been to before were not near this organized. The swimmers were called up to pre-staging by event numbers. They sat in rows by their lane number. As the front row was escorted into staging, the other groups moved up a row of chairs. [image of Kevin waiting with his fellow swimmers]

Eventually, each heat group was taken into the next room, row by row, then to the pool deck. There were places for five heats on the deck. I stayed with Kevin the whole time from pre-staging until his group was escorted onto the deck, then I went to sit in the stands to watch. [image of Kevin ready to swim or maybe an image of his heat in queue on the deck]

He swam well, really used his arms. The qualifying times of his competitors were all within 4 seconds, I thought he might have a chance to win. I reminded him the whole time waiting in staging, long arms, reach... Sometimes he gets lazy and doggy-paddles. Coming down the stretch I guessed Kevin was going to finish 5th or 6th, it was a tight race. He got to the end and forgot to touch the wall and when he did, it was a 7th place finish. [image of a line of eight wet towel-draped swimmers on the medal stands, Kevin on the far right, receiving ribbons and medals for their accomplishments]

Kevin didn't have anymore events for the day so I took him down to the Baltimore Zoo. I invited Dan to drive up to join us and he did. [arty image of elephant trunk and underwater image of swimming polar bear]

Something triggered in Kevin's brain and he didn't want to go back to Towson after the zoo. We tried to distract him with a trip to the mall where we bought some shorts for him and two cool deck chairs. He still didn't want to go anywhere but home.

So Dan took him home.

I drove back to Towson and cleared out the room and drove back to Bowie. I was heart broken, sad because Kevin loves to swim but he didn't want to swim any more.

Saturday night at home was fine, I don't remember much. Kevin was fine unless he was asked about swimming, NO Swimming!. I did ask him if he wanted Five Guys for lunch tomorrow.

I couldn't do laundry since the washer was dead. The new one is being delivered Saturday. The first load will be towels. I think I can last that long with what we have now. I'm trying not to need to go to the laundromat. We have a busy week, there's no room in the schedule for a trip there.

Sunday

I woke up at 5:30 ahead of my alarm. Dan, Kevin and I were in the car back to Towson by 6:15. At that point all Kevin knew was if he wanted Five Guys for lunch, he had to get in the car. At some point in the ride Dan asked me what Kevin had that day, and all I said was "50 Free and 25 Back." Kevin went ballistic again: "NO Swimming!" but I kept driving.

When we got to the university we found the team in the dining hall for breakfast. Did I mention how bad the food was? Horrible. Catered by the same company for years. They oughtta be fired. We ate on the way up. The coaches were so glad to see Kevin'd come back. Kevin's mood was better when he saw them, too.

The 50 Freestyle was the second race of the day after #144, the 1500 Free. Kevin's event heat was #163 so we waited in staging for a long time. I kept coaching him over and over: long arms, touch the wall, swim back. He's forgotten to turn and swim back right away in qualifiers before.

I joined Dan in the stands when Kevin's group was escorted to the pool deck. He'd been watching the women's heats of the 50 free. They run the heats slowest to fastest putting swimmers in groups so they have no more than a 15% difference in qualifying times. I had just missed the fastest woman's heat. Dan told me the woman who won finished in 27-point-something seconds, impressive. I looked up on Towson's Pool Record board, the record for the 50 free was 22-point-something seconds. Kinda makes the the SO win even more impressive.

Kevin swam brilliantly, touched the wall and remembered to come back. His qualifying time was 1:40, he finished in 1:11 winning first by 17 seconds. He even would have won the next heat with that time. [image of the field with Kevin in a big lead] [movie of the medal ceremony with Kevin, blue towel wrapped around his legs, in the center on the top step fidgeting until his name is called]

We got a short break before we were back in staging again for the 25 back. This time I coached him "head back long arms." This time the race was tight, maybe he was second, maybe he was third, couldn't tell. This time he turned over too much to touch the wall at the end. "Shoulder past vertical" was the DQ explanation. Didn't matter much. Kevin stood on the medal stands just like before with a big smile on his face. To him, life is good, gold or not, and better with a Five Guys burger for lunch.



 

E

Yesterday I cut out of work early to take Kevin to the eye doctor. His neurologist thought she saw his left eye wandering during her recent exam and wanted an ophthalmologist to check him out. I prepped him ahead of time by telling him he was going to the eye doctor and he'd have to read letters for her.

Just like at my eye doctor's office, he was seen first by the fellow, the doctor doing a fellowship or rotation in that department, whom I dub "the understudy," then by the regular doctor. Kevin did fine reading all the letters and she found his eyes to be normal, not wandering. When it came time for the dilating drops the understudy said they would take 40 minutes to work at which point I told her my eyes are very sensitive and dilate very quickly and he's probably like me in that regard since we have the same color eyes. So she used the weakest drops they had, the ones for preemies, and was surprised 15 minutes later his eyes were ready. Rookies. Sheesh.

She then did the part of the exam where she looks into his eyes with bright lights and a big magnifying lens. I know I hate that part, I was afraid for The Boy, the light always hurts, but Kevin did great. The regular doctor looked at him next and repeated some of the exam to verify results. Everything is fine, good vision, good pressures, no problems. And no issues with Kevin balking at the exam. I was relieved all the way round.




 

I just turned my back for a second...

I've wanted to post this picture for a while. Kevin brought me my phone one day to show me the letters he had photographed. I didn't even know he had it. He figured out how to turn on the phone, open the camera, and press the shutter button. Several times.

Kevin started forming an attachment to my iPhone and I was afraid I'd never be able to use it again. He decided it belonged in his hands or in the charger, and he would get upset if I tried to make a call with it.

Dan and I ended up buying him his own "iPhone," an 8gb iTouch, (much to the chagrin of Fern, of course) so I could have my phone back. I loaded it up with a bunch of free apps and a lot of his favorite music. He loves it and it doesn't matter it's not really a phone, even though that's what he calls it.

Oh, and he LOVES the iPhone ads on TV. He has to rewind them and watch them over and over again, they make him giggle and smile.

I just wish they made the iTouch with a camera in it, I'd love to see more of Kevin's art. Maybe if I'm brave, I'll let him use my phone again.
 

Got Tired?

I was hoping Kevin would have been a bit more tuckered out last night, but he wasn't. He was still heading off to bed at 1:30. Sheesh.

I was hoping for an earlier bed time because Monday and Tuesday nights he had attended new activities. Monday night he started a new gymnastics class. It's a main-stream class at the sports center held once a week for 11 weeks. Since Kevin's not ready to do a regular class by himself I called for an inclusion aide to be with him. I had to drop him off early, his class started at 7:15 and my water aerobics class started at 7:00. I checked him in at the desk and told the gal he has autism and someone from inclusion was supposed to show up. We told Kevin where to wait since he was so early and I went to my class saying a quick prayer for everything to work out.

After my class I got to observe the last bit of his. They were on the trampoline. The boys were to do a series of jumps: tuck, straddle, pike, and turn. I saw the aide sitting with Kevin (yay!) while he awaited his turn. The instructor was great working with each boy at his level, and patiently showed Kevin what to do. He got the tuck jump down pat, but couldn't combine that with a straddle jump. Maybe next week.

After the class the inclusion aide introduced herself to me and said Kevin did well and tried everything and followed instructions well. I explained if Kevin doesn't follow a rule, write it down for him to read and usually he'll get it.

Last night Kevin went to his strength training class for teens and adults with disabilities. He'd missed the first class last week because he was sick, but fell right into the routine of the group when he got there. The instructor said he did well, did everything twice. Upon quizzing him on the way home, Kevin told me he did the treadmill, the bike, the stair stepper and used the weights. I asked what the number was on the weights and he said 10. Maybe he'll go to bed earlier if they give him 15's to use?

Rounding up November

Wow, I've got two weekends to round up. I'll try not to forget any of the good parts and summarize the boring bits.

In this Issue:

• Gadget Corner


• IEP Season


• He did What?


• Teen Drama


• Thanksgiving vs. Mendoza


• High Def Rain

Gadget Corner

A while back on John's blog he got a comment from a fellow trucker who runs. I checked out her blog and she had written about a GPS pedometer. Since I walk every morning I wanted one. I want to know how far I really walk and how fast. I was thinking the $150 model would suit me fine. When I didn't get one for my birthday I used the Costco coupon for $40 off the model they have and got the $300 model for $160. I'm loving it, it's a fun gadget. It draws a trail where I walk and beeps at me when I drop below a 15:20 mile, which happens a lot when the three of us talk too much in the mornings. I've logged over 27 miles so far and end up finishing the 3.06-mile loop in about 44 minutes. Not too bad.

IEP Season

For some reason they wanted to change Kevin's IEP schedule from spring to fall. So last Monday I went in and met with Kevin's team. It was actually the first time I'd met his current teacher because the one who started the school year quit. The meeting was lead by the head of the Special-Ed department and not the new teacher.

Most of the plan was the same as last year, but I didn't think they had enough math concepts covered so I had comparisons added (less than, greater than, before, after) as well as a component of measuring. I also inquired about shop class. Kevin loves to put things together and I think with some supervised instruction, he'd do well. I'd like him to transition from pictorial instructions to reading and comprehending written assembly instructions. My inquiry was a general question, Is it possible in the future Kevin could take shop class, maybe next year? He's now signed up for Tech-ed for next semester. Ohmigoodness, that scares me and thrills me at the same time. He'll be in the regular-ed boys every-other day. I'm sure I'll report how that goes.

He did what?

Kevin caught a cold last weekend and by Monday night his voice was gone. We kept him home from school on Tuesday. Kevin hardly ever gets sick, Tuesday was his first missed day of school in several years. But that's beside the point. We don't stock a lot of liquid cold medicine for him since he doesn't usually need it, and had nothing to give him for all his symptoms except gel-caps. Which he swallowed without ceremony. I was stunned, Dan was shocked. We were both happy with this new skill.

Teen Drama

Applications for First Choice High (FCH) were due on the 21st by 2:30 pm. The application packet consisted of the form, copies of the 7th grade final report card and the first quarter 8th grade card, and an optional essay. I'm not sure how the whole thing went down but I found part of the packet for Fern's neighborhood friend on our kitchen counter on Saturday the 22nd.

I asked Fern why Amanda's application was in our house. She starts flipping out. "Dad was supposed to turn that in, Amanda's gonna hate me, her mom's gonna be mad at her and she's gonna hate me.....," talking fast and anxious like only teen girls can do. We can't ask Dan, who turned in Fern's packet on Friday morning, didn't turn in Amanda's. He was on a road trip to La Grange, KY for a college roommate's surprise 50th birthday party in another college friend's car and his phone was in his car parked at that friend's house.

No one specifically said to Dan, "here is Amanda's application, will you turn it in too, please?" But Fern swears we said we'd take it and knew about it. I left for work early that day and knew nothing about special requests. I turned it in to the high school on the way to the IEP meeting.

As it turns out, the head of the special-ed is good friends with one of the chairs of FCH and emailed her my story when I was there for the IEP meeting the following Monday. (FCH, is a special application-only honors program within the local high school.) In the mean time, I called Amanda's mom to explain what happened on our end and where the application was. She wasn't mad at us or at Amanda. It was her responsibilty after all. Amanda's not mad at Fern, and Fern is not mad at us. The FCH chair called me and accepted the app late anyway. Now, if Amanda gets in and Fern doesn't, heads will roll, baby, heads will roll.

Thanksgiving vs. Mendoza.

I'm still above my Mendoza line and am not happy about it. I get so close, then go and do something stupid like have cake at a birthday party Saturday night. Grrr. I'll be doing the "on the ball" class at the gym at lunch and I'll be back to my water aerobics class tonight. There were no classes last week, which didn't help the cause any.

High Def Rain

Three weeks ago I negotiated a fabulous deal with DirecTV for high def service and picked an install date of yesterday, it was the first Sunday appointment they had. I hate taking off work to wait for someone to maybe show up in a 12-4 window. The guy showed up at 2:00. Except it was raining. And the tech wouldn't climb up on the roof in the rain for an hour and install a new 40lb dish. Grrr. I complained and got free Show Time for several months. They are supposed to be coming back today and Dan, the great guy that he is, is going home to meet them when they call so say they are on the way. I bet they forget to call. Scattered showers in the forecast for the afternoon, too.

Shopping With Kevin

I took Kevin shopping for jeans the other day. He's in another growth spurt and is showing a lot of ankle again so I set out to cover them up.

The boy is rapidly approaching six feet tall, he's probably just a half inch shy now, and he weighs 110 pounds. Picture a light pole looming over everybody nearby, a light pole with a lot of sock glaring between the jeans and the high-top sneakers, that is. I headed to Sears so see what they had. In the Boys' department he's about a size 12 in the waist and a 20 in length. In the Men's department he's about a 25x32. However, the smallest waist available is 28". Sheesh.

I gave him a pair of regular fit 28x32 Lee's and took him to the men's fitting room. Three times I explained about going in the room, putting on the new pants, and coming back out to show me. I was apprehensive but hopeful. I waited outside the door for what seemed like forever, and eventually he came out wearing jeans that were finally long enough, but sereral inches too big at the waist and very baggy in the butt. They didn't droop too much as to violate the dress code at school so I decided to buy them. I found four pairs of 28x32 pants, each a different color and asked him to pick out two. I asked him if he wanted a belt. "NO!"

The next day I did some searching on the 'net for skinnier jeans. I found a place that'll make them for you for $135 but the smallest waist on their pull-down list was 28". Sheesh. Not that I would actually spring for $135 jeans for my baby, but why brag about custom-fit jeans if you're not going to make them small enough for your average bean pole?

And before you even ask, No, I'm not going to make jeans for him myself!

 

Kevin Being Kevin

Friday night Fern went off on a sleepover so Dan, Kevin and I headed out to play par-three golf. It was the first time I'd played in a while and since Dan and I were playing Monday, I thought it was good to get some practice in. Monday was Columbus Day, the only true "federal holiday," of the school year, a federal holiday for us, a school day for the kids. But I digress, back to golf.

For Kevin we brought a putter and a 6-iron. He'd tee off with his six and sometimes he'd hit it well, forty or fifty yards, other times only five. He would run ahead and hit his ball again and again until it was on the green, always running from shot to shot. Since it was late in the day, I didn't bother the other players when I had to holler at Kevin to stop and wait for us when he got his ball on the green. He enjoys things like that so much, it's nice to watch him have fun.

---

Kevin's been having more autistic/OCD bouts lately. They manifest mostly at bedtime when he should be taking a shower but "checking" on us, mostly Dan, instead. We have to be in bed just right, on our backs, arms and legs fully under the covers. Then he'll head off to the bathroom and we'll get comfortable again and instead of showering, he'll check on us again. And again, fixing us each time. Normally Kevin is the most happy-go-lucky kid I know and his autism is a non-issue. But when he gets into these cycles where he can't let go and move on, it just drives me nuts. And Dan too. Especially at bedtime when we're all tired. Fern will go to bed eventually when you remind her enough times. Kevin, not so much. Sometimes I just want to snap my fingers and say "Stop being autistic and GO. TO. BED!"

---

Kevin doesn't care what he's wearing, colors and patterns don't have to match, pants don't have to be long enough. I usually suggest shirts and pants so he won't stand out as the "weird kid" but other times it's not worth the fight of changing clothes when what he's wearing is almost acceptable. Like when he came down the other day wearing pants that were long enough but a but big around the middle. I asked him if he wanted a belt but when I got close enough to him, I realized those pants were mine.

Keeping the Doctor Away

Four septuagenarian eyes peer at the tiny screen.

"It's right here, Ma," I touch the screen indicating the location of their house.

"I need my reading glasses."

"I need mine, too."

My parents toddle off and return a few moments later, bespectacled, ready to see their house and land on my iPhone.

"Does that thing tell you how to get home?"

"It can if I ask it to show me," I reply, but I'm really thinking Why do I need directions outta here when I've been driving home from here for years?

Ah, don'cha just love parents.

Kevin and I made an unexpected trip out to the Valley for apples yesterday. I have two favorite apples, first picked Golden Delicious, still green and crunchy, sweet and also slightly tart; and Staymans, late season apples, also crisp and tart.

After church I went to the Bowie farmer's market and saw some of the stalls had apples and I realized it was time. You can only get good first-picked Goldens for about five days in September or they'll be mushy. I cannot stand mushy apples. It's like eating solid apple sauce. Yuck.

I called my folks and asked if the goldens had come in yet. Dad called me back (over an hour later!) and reported two local orchards had them in for $18 and $19 a bushel. We're on our way.

Kevin and I headed west for a two-hour trip to the Shenandoah Valley for a quick visit with the parents and apple shopping. We came back with a bushel box of delicious Golden Delicious. To keep them fresh for the longest time possible, I packed the apples into 2.5 gallon zip bags and put them in the fridge. There were 12 that didn't fit so I put them in a lovely terracotta and blue mixing bowl and displayed my catch predominately on the kitchen counter, along with the other weekend catches: newspapers, mail, and the new crock pot direction booklet (but that's another story altogether).

Since the chicken in the crock pot failed miserably, I started making spaghetti-n-sauce for Kevin. He started cutting apples up into wedges with the apple cutter. Not just one apple, mind you. He put his slices into a bowl and proudly showed me his work. They were in the terracotta mixing bowl. And where are the apples that were in there? All over the counter.

"Kevin, Honey, you need to put those apples back in a bowl so they won't roll onto the floor." I go back to my cooking and turn around a few minutes later to see a whole row of cereal bowls on the counter with one apple each.

Ah, children, don'cha love them?
 

Weekend Round-Up

I've been trying to write a weekend round-up post for a couple of days now and stuff keeps getting in the way. Like work.

In This Issue:

• Mr. Clean


• Child Services


• Laundry Queen


• Back to School

Mr. Clean

Last Friday was Day 3 after the teeth got pulled. My poor baby. I feel so bad having done this to Kevin without his full comprehension. Because of his autism, it's hard to explain it to him. He's so independent, he pretty much takes care of himself when it comes to napping when he is tired and eating when he's hungry. So He napped a good part of Wednesday and Thursday and ate very little despite the offerings of food. By Thursday night, he felt well enough to take a shower and by Friday morning he showered again and again and had taken three showers in 12 hours. I'm not really sure why.

I finally got him to swish the salt water in his mouth and not drink it. It took a lot of modeling but finally he got it. He even made his own cups of salt water after that.

The doctor said he'd only need ice on his cheeks for the first 12 hours, but Kevin made his own ice packs through Monday. I guess he knew he felt better with them. I wish he could explain it to me.

Child Services

Saturday morning Dan drove down to rendezvous with his sister to collect Fern since she had spent the week there with her cousin, Rose.

While she was gone I went into her room and got her hamper and collected all the clothes that were on the floor. Then I scraped together all the flotsam and jetsam from the periphery of her room into a pile, you know, that stuff she ignores when she thinks her room is clean. It's hard to ignore when it's in a big pile. All she has to do is sit down in one place and sort through the debris and, voila, her room is clean. But as I did I knew she'd be mad at me for doing it.

Laundry Queen

Saturday I added the laundry I got from The Girl's room to the pile in the laundry room. I got through most of it so there wasn't enough of any one type of clothes left to make a full load of anything. Whew. I even did a few loads of sheets and towels.

But on the other side of getting laundry done, is putting it away. Another chore I'm bad at. The pile on my dresser is so high I can barely see the mirror so I started a new pile on the floor next it. I have too many clothes, I know I do, but I'm reluctant about getting rid of stuff. AM helped me last week get rid of a lot of dresses that don't really fit or are hopelessly out of style. I am always grateful for her help, (always, always, always) and we cleared out a lot of rod space in my closet, but I wish she could have stayed for another hour or so. I need to clear out more to make room for the clean clothes I just washed.

My goal is to get the master bedroom in shape. Soon. I got part of the room cleaned up over the weekend, but now the cleaned-up spot needs vacuuming. Somehow our room collects stuff. Kevin likes to play in there. Like the rest of the house. Sheesh.

Back to School

Monday morning, the culmination of a summer vacation, was the first day of school. Both kids were up and ready on time. I opened the garage doors at 7:20 and Kevin went out to wait at 7:25. And waited. And waited.

Fern's bus information had come in the mail a week before school started but we didn't hear anything about Kevin's bus. I had checked the school's web site and found out his bus would pick him up at 7:31. Because he's on a special ed bus, we usually get a call with the information, not just a letter. Finally over the weekend we got a call from his new driver telling us the same time.

His bus never showed, unless it was way early. Which on the first day of school, I highly doubt. By 8:15 there is still no bus so I started calling around. The guy at the bus lot was very nice, even offered to send a bus to pick him up. I declined. He said he'd talk to the driver and find out when she came by my house and call me back.

I took Kevin to school and waited my turn in the busy office to explain my presence. The new CRI teacher herself came up to get him instead of an aide, so I got to meet his new teacher. She seemed nice, but a little frazzled. I didn't hold it against her.

The bus lot guy did call me back (surprise!) and said the driver said she was at our house at 7:35, only a few minutes late. But I know she never stopped by our house, I was there. I'd remember a big yellow bus pass by. Tuesday morning, we were ready and waiting, and the bus went past our house before it stopped. Kevin ran across the lawn to get on. Now you know, if she really was at our house on Monday, she would have known where to stop on Tuesday. Right?

This morning I tried to ask her where she went on Monday and she dodged the question by saying she was sorry she was late. Arrrgggggg.
 

Catching Up

Sheesh, I haven't posted forever.

Somehow, I don't get to post from home much, just when I'm taking a break at work.

Yesterday I took the day off from work. Kevin had a pre-op appointment in the morning. His wisdom teeth are blocking his 12-year molars from coming in so they have to come out. Because of his autism, the oral surgeon wants to do the work at a surgery center where he'll have a professional nursing staff to monitor Kevin's recovery, instead of in his office where recovery consists of sitting in a chair until you're awake enough to walk out. The surgery is planned for next Wednesday.

After I got Kevin back to his day camp I went home and cleaned the kitchen, complete with a floor mopping. I was waiting to hear from my brother and dad. They were coming out to help with some yard work and I had to give them directions to the rental center. If you read my husband's blog you might remember this post about his tree-trimming project.

We hadn't done anything with the trimmed branches, they were still where they fell. For months Dan and I talked about how to get rid of them. There was a lot of branches from the 20 trees. Too many to drag to the curb on yard-trash days. We considered buying a personal sized chipper but that meant we'd still have a lot of work cutting down the branches so they'd fit. We considered renting a chipper, as well as hiring a tree company.

I ended up renting a industrial sized chipper which took limbs up to 6" in diameter. OK, stop thinking Fargo. My brother came out with his truck with a trailer hitch so we could get the thing home. For two hours Mark and I hauled, dragged and carried branches to the chipper while my Dad fed them in the chute, except when Dad took a break and took pictures of his kids (I'll have to check his blog later to see if he posted them) and Mark and I did the chute feeding.

It was fun watching big branches go in and mulch come out. I wanted to put in something else to watch it shred à la Malcolm in the Middle but since the rental company had my $800 deposit and I wanted it back, I thought better of it.

My new mulch pile is about 3' tall by 3' wide. That ought to cover a couple flower beds when I find the energy to haul it around the yard. Can I use that right away or does it have to age for a while? Anyone know?

Monday I took the day off, too. Dan and I played golf with AM and Mark in another fund-raising tournament. I started off playing OK, but went down-hill mid-way through. I guess I used up too many good shots at the driving range before we played.

Saturday I took AM out to a local executive course to play nine holes. She hadn't golfed since the tournament in May and I thought she'd like the practice. I played very well Saturday. Except for putting, we won't talk about that. At many of the latter holes, while we were waiting for the guy in front of us to finish, we'd hit two balls instead of just one. AM called it "testicle golf."

Portrait of Modern Parents

Scene: Last night; middle school cafeteria; crowded; rows of folding chairs filled with lots of parents with cameras; chairs and podium on the stage.

I'm sitting on a aisle seat so I can get up quickly to take pictures when I need to. I don't know where Dan is sitting.

The orchestra sounds better than I expected.

My cell phone rings and I put my earbud in and took the call.

I enjoy three selections by the 7th grade band.


The Rest of the Story:

I'm at Tasker Middle for the 8th grade awards ceremony, Dan's at Ogle Middle at Fern's spring band concert. Both started at 7:00 pm. Kevin sat with the students on the front row. From where I was sitting I could see a little of him and he seemed well behaved. He got called up to the stage four times for awards in "most improved in science," "academic excellence in math and reading," "academic excellence with a 4.0 gpa," and perfect attendance. Each time he went up with little or no prompting, accepted his certificate, and shook hands with the administrators and returned to his seat like a pro. Dan calls me when the 7th graders take the stage so I can hear Fern play. Shortly after she was done I lost reception so I couldn't return the favor and Dan couldn't hear Kevin's name for his 4.0 gpa. I did take pictures, however. But I can't post them because the camera battery is on the charger at home. Doh.