Try and Try Again- A New Month's Resolution

On January first I decided on a resolution, to lose five pounds. I amended it to a "new month's" resolution, to lose five pounds by the end of the month. The very next day I was up a pound and a half. Not a good start. Now I had to lose 6.5 lbs to reach the goal.

At the end of January I'd lost 4 lbs. I set the goal again for February. I wasn't very clear if it was for a new five pounds, or just to get to the original goal. Vague was good. The ultimate goal is ten lbs from the high point, but I wanted to break it down in monthly chunks.

A week into the new month I'd lost another pound and it was staying lost. A week later, the weight pretty stable-neither up nor down, I saw an orthopedist who said I had tendinitis in my right bicep and prescribed an anti-inflammatory to be taken on a full stomach. You know what that meant, I'd forget to take the pills with dinner so I'd have to have a hearty snack at bedtime which lead to regaining all the weight I'd lost.

Now, here it is, the first of March, I'm ready to try again. I'm off the anti-inflammatory, my shoulder is feeling better, I have no excuse. I weighed in this morning at a lower weight than I'd had for a couple weeks, but still above the goal.

So, here it is, my goal, down in writing. I will lose the rest of the original five pounds by the end of March. (This will be harder than you think, I'll be Europe for a week this month.) I will keep it off in April and start working on the next five in May.

It really bugs me when other women say I look fine, that I don't need to lose weight. I always thank them, but I know, my pants know I do. I need to learn where the breaking point is on the food intake now that I'm, uh, not a kid anymore. I need to retrain my brain about not needing snacks. I'll never be a size 4 again, but it sure would be nice not to ever become a size 14. Hence, the goal, to break it down, a couple pounds at a time, no crazy crash diets, get it off, keep it off.